Eternal Love
by Nature9000
Summary: An unexpected tragedy occurs, a month later Sam is at breaking point. What will she do now that the one she loves is dead because of her? Can she survive alone or will she finally break, the answers can be found at a bridge where she first met Freddie.R


Eternal Love

Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly, get used to it. Now read the story and enjoy it.

-TAKE THE PLUNGE FROM SEDDIE BRIDGE-

* * *

She lay on her bed with her head in the pillow, the sunlight poured through the window but it was still so dark to her. Her face must have been stained with streak marks and her eyes were in pain, her pillow was soaking wet and her hair hadn't been groomed in days. The floor and the bed were covered with tissues and littered with clothes, books and several other items. Outside her door she could hear voices talking to one another. "She's been like this for days."

"Shouldn't she get over it by now?"

"You would think she'd get over it, how difficult is it really?" It pained her to turn her head toward the door when it opened. A foot stepped into the room as the door brushed some used tissues away. She listened as her mom's calm voice came in an attempt to soothe her.

"Sam honey, how do you feel?" Mrs. Puckett asked. She started to answer her mother but only a hoarse, groggy sound came from her throat. "You need to go back to school sometime Sam. I know it's hard, but you have to pick yourself up and pull yourself into shape." Mrs. Puckett smiled and sat down, she placed a gentle hand on Sam's back and rubbed it. "You can't continue to be depressed forever, I know it's difficult but you must understand, you can move on." Sam only scowled, her mom didn't know anything at all, she couldn't just move on, it wasn't that easy. It had only been a single month and she couldn't move on, how could anybody expect that, even her own mother. Sam couldn't help but to wonder why Carly had never bothered to visit her.

She knew everyone was blaming her, they always blamed her. Whenever something happened, she was just the easy target and the one that people could blame without having to worry about her retaliating. That was why she had always put up such a tough front; she always built up such heavy defenses so she wouldn't have to get hurt. She never knew that by doing so, she would only cause herself more grief. Mrs. Benson wouldn't even come to say hi to her anymore, Spencer would drop by every now and then. She had lost the only one true friend and she blamed herself for it, in fact, everybody blamed her. It was true though, wasn't it? It was her fault he was gone now, the one person that she always loved, though she denied those feelings to the very core.

"I-I didn't mean it, mom," Sam stated. Somehow she managed to find the strength to talk; it was hard for her to even utter a single word without breaking in tears. "It's all my fault he's gone, I should have just told him how I truthfully felt."

"Oh honey." Mrs. Puckett grabbed her daughter and lifted her up. She hugged Sam close to her and rocked back and forth as Sam wept bitter tears into her mother's shirt. "You know it wasn't your fault, you were scared and confused at the time. It was only normal."

"Things could have been different though."

"Things are as they are; you just have to accept it. There was nothing you could have done to change what happened and if I could go back, I would change what happened for you."

"Why do I have to be so tough, people hate me now…I didn't even cry at his own funeral."

"Yes you did. You may not have been crying on the outside, but I know you were crying on the inside, his death affected you as it did everyone else. Just let it all out Sam, it is perfectly okay to cry." Mrs. Puckett looked over at a stuffed dog that was sitting on a nearby table, it was the only thing in the entire room that was not littering the ground. She remembered the day she first saw that little dog, it was the day Freddie came to her to reveal his feelings for Sam.

-_Flashback-_

Mrs. Puckett was sitting on the couch and watching her favorite television show when she heard the doorbell ring. She put the television on mute and stood up slowly. She had a small cold that day and the weather was cloudy, there was chance that it would rain later the day. She walked to the door and opened it, Freddie was standing at the door with a smile on his face. "Hello there, Freddie, Sam is not here right now," Mrs. Puckett said quietly.

"Oh I know that, I just wanted to get your opinion of something," Freddie said with a smirk. "You see, I got these for Sam." Mrs. Puckett smiled as Sam pulled a stuffed dog, flowers and chocolate from behind him. "I was wondering if Sam would appreciate these."

"Freddie, I think she will love them to be honest. I also should say that you're taking a step in the right direction, do you know her feelings for you?"

"She picks on me all the time, but that doesn't mean I don't care for her. I love her, Mrs. Puckett, and I want to protect her always. I cherish Sam with all my heart…"

"You should be telling her these things."

"To be honest, I'm a little afraid of what she's going to think."

"I think she feels the same way about you that you feel for her, I can see that gleam in her eye every time she talks about you or hears your name. She builds up pretty high defenses though, so don't get too worried if she tries to hide her feelings, you know, she's been hurt before."

"Really, what happened?" Freddie asked with an interested voice. Mrs. Puckett sighed and smiled softly as she looked to the little brown and white stuffed dog in Freddie's hands, it had a little heart in its mouth that said I Love You.

"Well other than that Jonah boy, she had feelings for someone once a long time ago, all you really need to know is that those feelings were never returned. One day he did say he'd go out with her but when he did, he pretty much made a fool of her and called her desperate."

"I would never hurt her like that."

"Yeah, that's really the reason why she acts like she does, she doesn't really trust boys all that much anymore but she always told me you were the one boy she trusted. I think she may very well have feelings for you."

"I will try and keep that in mind, thanks for that Mrs. Puckett. So you think she'll like these?" Mrs. Puckett smiled and nodded her head.

"She will love them."

"I hope so, you don't think the box of chocolate and the flowers are too much, do you?"

"No."

"Okay, so you're positive she will absolutely adore these?" Mrs. Puckett sighed and smiled as she nodded her head. She knew Sam would love the gifts, what girl wouldn't love the gifts if they came from someone else's heart?

_-End Flashback-_

Sam did love the gifts it seemed, she kept them with her almost all the time now. The chocolates were actually kept in the drawer of the table beside Sam's bed, she hadn't eaten a single one since that day. The flowers were kept in the drawer as well, they were next to an image of Freddie. Mrs. Puckett hugged her daughter closer as Sam's grandparents stood outside the door, it pained her that Sam had to hear their disapproval of Sam's actions.

"Mom, why do they think I can just get over the one person I've ever truly loved?" Sam asked with a pained voice, her throat was dry and it ached from all the crying and screaming she had done.

"They're more set in their ways, dear," Mrs. Puckett said softly. "They don't understand how a girl can love someone at the age of fifteen, don't let what they say bother you sweetie."

"Mom, why doesn't Carly ever visit anymore?"

"I don't know sweetie, I don't know." Sam had noticed that Carly continued doing iCarly without stopping, apparently Spencer was taking over Freddie's job as the tech producer. Carly said maybe a few words for Freddie during one webcast and that was it. Sam know it was Carly just trying to be peppy and happy despite the circumstances, but she didn't seem all that sad about her friend's demise.

"I don't really like the rain, mom."

"I know you don't, I know." Mrs. Puckett looked out the window and frowned, it was supposed to be a beautiful morning, but now rain was starting to fall. Whenever it rained, she and Sam would be forced to remember that day that Freddie's death occurred, the very day Freddie had come to her.

-_Flashback-_

Mrs. Puckett blew her nose and tossed the Kleenex in a trashcan, it had been a few hours since Freddie came to her door and now it was raining very violently, she hoped Sam would be returning home soon so she wouldn't catch a cold as well. Mrs. Puckett sat back on the couch and flipped on the television, she could barely hear the television with all the thunder and rain that was outside, she did however, hear the doorbell and a knock. For some reason, she was not pleased with it as she slowly stood up and heard a crack of thunder. She opened the door as lightning flashed through the house, a man in a black uniform with a black cap stood in front of the door, she could faintly make out a police badge.

"Are you Mrs. Amy Puckett?" The man asked.

"Yes officer, is something wrong?" Mrs. Puckett raised her eyebrow and looked at the officer with concern and worry in her eyes. She noticed the officer didn't seem too thrilled to be out in the rain. "Would you care to come in, sir?"

"No ma'am, I am merely here to inform you that about an hour ago Samantha Puckett was found unconscious in the arms of her boyfriend, if I am correct."

"She doesn't have a boyfriend…"

"There were two men, one was identified as Freddie Benson and the other was a common street mugger. Your daughter suffered a blow but survived, Mr. Benson was not so lucky." Mrs. Puckett gasped softly as the officer continued his explanation and halted when lightning flashed a second time. "You may want to come to the hospital now."

"Yes sir."

-_End Flashback-_

Mrs. Puckett helped Sam to get ready for school, Sam couldn't walk around the living room without her grandparents shooting her odd looks. "What was this boy to you?" Her grandfather asked. "Why are you so worked up over one boy?"

"You have your whole life ahead of you," Granny Puckett stated. "Don't let this control your life." Sam looked to the ground and let the tears fall down her cheeks, her mother stepped in front of her and groaned.

"Could you not hassle my daughter right now?" Mrs. Puckett asked.

"It's been a month, Amy," Grandpa Puckett said quickly. "She should be over this boy by now, she should move on."

"Look, she obviously hasn't, she cared about Freddie with all her heart and she said the wrong things that day. She doesn't need you to bother her any more. So if you're going to continue hassling my daughter, and might I add that she's _my_ daughter, not yours, then I'd appreciate it if you left my home."

"We mean no harm, we're only trying to get her to realize that she doesn't need to be so upset over this friend of hers."

"Is it that hard to see that she was in love with him? As much as I hate to admit it dad, you are being incredibly arrogant right now!"

"Mom, it's okay," Sam said quietly. "I just want to go to school now, I don't need to eat any breakfast." Mrs. Puckett turned to her daughter and frowned, she knew Sam was taking it hard. Nobody seemed to act the same toward Sam after Freddie's death and she didn't deserve it. Mrs. Puckett watched as Sam walked out the door, she turned and glared at her parents who sunk into the couch.

Sam walked to school and ignored the drizzle that fell from the skies. She ignored several things, like the dog that was barking at her from across the street. She would normally respond by throwing a joking insult at the dog. Sam took off her backpack and unzipped it to see the small stuffed dog inside, she smiled and caressed the heart with her fingers. She couldn't think of why she didn't tell Freddie the way she really felt about him. She frowned and zipped up the backpack, not even one of Mrs. Briggs detentions would make her feel worse than she already did. She slowly walked toward the school doors and frowned, she did not want to go inside, she was practically isolated by everybody that would be in there. A tear ran down her face as she stared up into the sky.

-_Flashback-_

Sam had just finished grabbing a smoothie when it started to rain, she figured that it was time for her to start heading home, she paid for the treat and left the building. She didn't seem to mind walking in the rain, she wasn't fond of it though, but the rain was not pelting down at the moment.

"Sam!" A voice called out. Sam turned around to see Freddie running up behind her.

"What are you doing in the rain, tech geek?" Sam asked with a smirk. "Are you sure your mother allows you to be out in the rain?"

"She doesn't care and if she does, she'll get over it," Freddie said as he shrugged his shoulders, Sam chuckled and crossed her arms in response..

"Well I'm fixing to go home, so if you're looking for someone to eat smoothies with, I'm not available."

"I actually don't want any of those right now," Freddie said with a grin. "Actually, I wanted to give you these." Sam's eyes widened as Freddie pulled a stuffed dog, box of chocolates and some flowers from behind him, Sam felt a small blush coming to her cheeks.

"W-What the hell is this?"

"These are a few gifts, I wanted to tell you something." Sam looked at Freddie and noticed his eyes were sharp and determined, her heart beat slightly harder than normal.

_"Come on, crack an insult,"_ She thought. _"Say something, back out now. Don't get too deep, you'll only get hurt."_

"Sam, for so long I have felt strongly for you, I believe that I may have fallen in love with you."

"Y-You can't be sure…It's impossible." Sam gulped silently as Freddie smiled softly, she could feel her heart flutter, she couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Sam, I'm more sure of this than ever before, I love you Sam, you're the greatest girl in the world." Sam held the stuffed dog in her hands and clutched it tightly against her chest. Freddie actually loved her, she often pondered her feelings for him and she knew she loved him as well. She had to be sure though, she had to know if he wasn't just messing with her emotions like all the other guys did, besides, he loved Carly too.

"What about Carly?" Sam's eyes narrowed as Freddie shook his head.

"I've never loved her."

"You can't mean that, you do love her, you say it all the time for crying out loud! How the hell can you possibly love me if you are so much in love with Carly!" Sam stopped suddenly, she didn't intend or mean what came out, almost immediately she could see a glimmer of hurt cross Freddie's eyes. "Freddie…I didn't mean…"

"You know what, forget it. I should have known you didn't feel this way, I mean why the hell would you? You pick on me all the time, how the hell would you possibly care about me!"

"Freddie, hold on…" Sam felt her heart starting to sink, she was doing it again, she was turning another guy against her like always. _"Why does this always happen to me?"_ Sam placed her hand on Freddie's shoulder but he brushed it away. "Freddie, I'm sorry…it's just…I don't know."

"You know, I am capable of actually caring about other people. Forgive me for pretending to like Carly so that I could possibly get you to be interested in me." Sam narrowed her eyes and felt an unwanted surge of anger come to her, she didn't really care, but it was too late.

"So you're _using_ Carly just to get to me!" Sam growled and shoved Freddie back. "You arrogant bastard! You're a jerk, how could I possibly have thought I could fall for a man like you!" Sam knew she was yelling and she didn't know how to stop, she could see the hurt that she was causing for Freddie and she didn't want to do that. She loved Freddie and that's what she really wanted to say. She finally stopped yelling and placed her hand over her mouth. "Oh my god Freddie, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," Freddie said with his eyes downward. "I should never have bothered. I hope you actually like those gifts, I'll see you at the next webcast if I decide to show up and mend my shattered heart."

-_End Flashback-_

Sam closed her eyes and stepped into the school, she remembered that Freddie had walked away from her then with the saddest look on his face. She ruined everything right there and was afraid she ruined her chances of ever fixing things with him. She was going to apologize and tell him that she really loved him back, but it was too late.

"Oh, hey Sam," A voice said with a flat tone. Sam looked over to see Carly standing at her locker with her eyes narrowed. "I see you decided to come to school." Sam wanted to cry on Carly's shoulder, Carly was her best friend, at least that is what she thought.

"Carly, I…"

"You know, you really did mistreat him." Sam thought for a moment about how Carly might know what happened, then it occurred to her that in the thirty minute time span, Freddie could have called Carly.

"Did he call you that day?"

"Yes." Carly's tone was harsh to Sam's ears, Carly didn't seem to appreciate Sam's presence. "He called me right after you rejected him, you know, he and I had a damn deal." Carly turned and opened her locker. "He was only pretending to like me so that you might get jealous, it was actually me that had the goddamn idea. You treated Freddie very harshly."

"I didn't mean it!" Sam felt the hot tears rolling down her cheeks as Carly slammed the locker and turned toward Sam.

"Then why the hell did you say it!"

"I was afraid! I didn't want to get hurt again."

"So you chose to hurt Freddie?"

"No! I loved him! I didn't want it to happen. I wanted to tell him I loved him but it came out wrong. I had just been hurt so many times that I thought he was trying to mess with my head. Please, listen to me, I didn't want him to die."

"Yeah…whatever…" Carly turned around and walked away as Sam pressed her back against her locker. She never did get to tell Freddie she loved him, he died with her in his arms and a piece of her seemed to die with him.

-_Flashback-_

The rain was coming down harder now, it had been thirty minutes since she talked to Freddie and she felt like breaking down and crying. She held the stuffed dog close to her chest and rested her chin on it, she loved the thing already and that was because Freddie had given it to her. She decided she wanted to go back and catch him, he probably went back toward his home which was in the other direction. She turned around and her eyes widened as she spotted a large man standing behind her.

"Okay little missy, give me everything you have and maybe you won't get hurt," The man said.

"I'm not afraid of you," Sam said with a forceful voice.

"Oh you're not? Maybe I'll have to make you afraid of me." The man smirked and Sam let out a growl. "Perhaps you will bend over for me."

"What?" Sam processed the thought for a minute and noticed the man pull out a knife.

"Come here girly." The man slashed at Sam with the knife and she let out a scream as the man cut a part of the dog.

"Help!" Sam exclaimed as she turned and ran from the man. She looked back and noticed he was still following her. "Somebody!" Thunder blasted as she ran down the streets being hunted by the mugger, she desperately wished she had gone after Freddie sooner but she was too afraid. "Somebody help!" Sam tripped and nearly fell when the man snatched her, he held the knife to her throat and smirked.

"Nobody is going to help you little girl, now how about a little fun before I kill you?"

"Let go of me you bastard." Sam struggled slightly as the man placed his other hand on her thigh. She knew she couldn't fight her way out of his hold but she also knew screaming would be very beneficial. She started to scream when she looked over and saw Freddie turning the corner, he must have been moping for the time and had not gone home, he looked up and saw Sam being held and grew angry.

"Let her go you goddamn bastard!" Freddie exclaimed as he charged toward the mugger. "I'll teach you to hurt Sam!" The mugger chuckled and tossed Sam to the ground as he charged toward Freddie. He slashed Freddie across the chest with the knife and brought it down toward Freddie. Freddie grabbed the man's arm and growled as he struggled with him, somehow the knife pierced the mugger and caused him to stumble back. The man started to pant heavily as Sam got up and ran toward Freddie.

"Freddie, I'm so sorry!" Sam exclaimed. Freddie smiled and took Sam into his embrace.

"Don't be sorry," Freddie said quietly. "I understand that you were just protecting yourself and possibly Carly as well. Trust me, I would never use Carly to get to you if it wasn't with her consent."

"Freddie, I still shouldn't have said those things to you earlier, I don't know what I was thinking." Out of the corner of Sam's eyes she saw the mugger had fallen to his knees, it was evident that the mugger was going to die there, but he didn't appear to be done. Sam's eyes widened as the man pulled out a gun and fired a shot into Freddie's back, she could feel the bullet pierce through her body as well, but it didn't hit her in any vital areas. The two landed on the ground and Sam stared in fear into Freddie's eyes.

"S-Sam, I'm sorry…"

"What are you saying, Freddie? It'll be fine…you'll be just fine!"

"No, don't lie Sam, look at me." Sam was wrapped tightly in his arms but she could tell that blood was flowing from the left side of his chest, tears started to fall as she realized that the bullet probably pierced his heart. It had gone at an odd angle because it only grazed the side of her.

"Freddie, you're not going to die, you can't die."

"Sam, I love you always. Tell Carly and the others that I am going to miss them." Sam shook her head and struggled.

"No Freddie, you can't die because I need you with me! I love you Freddie Benson, I love you!" Sam looked at Freddie and noticed that his eyes were closed, she could not feel his heartbeat against her chest and she knew he must not have heard her words. "Freddie!" Sam started to scream his name in vain and she slowly started to sob into his chest. She couldn't believe that he was dead, she felt a sharp pain in her side and knew it was from her wound, she didn't understand why this was happening to her. She pondered that as she slowly lost consciousness.

-_End Flashback-_

"Why, what did I do to deserve life when he died?" Sam asked herself. "He didn't deserve to die, I loved him and I showed that in harsh ways."

"You're damn right," A voice said with bitter hate. Sam turned to see Mrs. Benson glaring at her. "He wasted his time falling in love with the likes of you."

"Why are you here, Mrs. Benson?"

"I'm here because I'm still cleaning out my son's locker and talking to his teachers. I don't know why you're showing your face around here though."

"I'm sorry Mrs. Benson, I really am."

"Yeah, I'm sure you are. You killed my Freddie, how the hell could you be sorry?" Sam glanced downward, everybody accused her of this, they would never know that she loved Freddie. She may have loved him longer than he loved her, she didn't know, but she knew she couldn't stand to be in school today. Thunder crackled as she turned and ran out the doors of the school, she heard Mrs. Benson shouting at her to not come back to the school.

_"Where am I going?"_ Sam asked herself. She knew she couldn't go to anybody, she was labeled a murderer now and she hated herself because of it. Her best friend, Carly, hated her even, she had to know if her viewers hated her, but she didn't feel that she cared. Sam ran all the way to Carly's apartment and began knocking on the door until Spencer opened up the door and saw her. He smiled at her but Sam could see the frown he had behind his eyes.

"Hey Sam, how are you?" Spencer asked with mock concern in his tone. Sam didn't know why he tried, he was just like everyone else, he didn't really care about her anymore.

"Hey Spencer, can I come in?" Sam asked with a small smile.

"Sure, you know, it is good to see you smile."

"Yeah, I'm glad you think so." Sam rolled her eyes and sighed as she walked into the room. "Do you know if you can hook me up to iCarly?"

"Why do you want to do that? You'll just alert every viewer that iCarly is starting. An email is sent to all those who view iCarly so they are alerted whenever it starts-"

"I don't care."

"Shouldn't you talk to Carly first? I mean when she sees the video-"

"Carly doesn't give a damn anymore! Nobody does! Don't try to tell me that you care either, I can see the way you look at me all the time, it's the same as everybody else. Nobody wants me to be happy and I know that will never happen because the one person that meant anything to me in this world is gone and it's all my damn fault, Spencer! I don't need half the goddamn world to tell me what I already know!"

"You already blame yourself for what happened?"

"Yes, now just hook me up to iCarly because I want to talk to the viewers anyway. I have some things that need to be said…"

"Sam, I hope you're not thinking of-"

"You hope I'm not thinking of what, killing myself? I've thought of that time and time again but I don't have the guts to do that. I would rather punish myself for the rest of my life than to waste time killing myself. I don't deserve to be with him, Spencer, I know that already from what everyone, including Carly herself, tell me."

"Carly told you didn't deserve to be with him?"

"Yes…" Spencer raised his eyebrow as he followed Sam up the stairs and into the place that iCarly is usually filmed. He knew Carly filmed without Sam and Freddie for the past few weeks, but she felt iCarly had to continue, regardless of what happened. Spencer found the camera and placed it on the tripod as he opened a nearby laptop, he then typed as Sam walked to the center of the room and brushed her tears away. "Okay Spencer, I'm ready whenever you are." Spencer looked up as Sam gave a very faint smile.

"Okay." Spencer walked to the camera and motioned for Sam to start.

"Hi, I'm Sam, but you knew that. I'm Sam Puckett, the 'biggest bitch' in the world." Spencer raised his eyebrow and Sam let a tear escape her cheek. Sam pointed toward Spencer. "I'd like to give a warm introduction to Carly's brother, Spencer." Spencer stood in front of the camera quickly and waved as he moved out of the way. "I don't know what Carly's been saying about me the past few weeks, but it's probably right. I killed our tech producer. I don't know what to say or how to say it, I loved Freddie Benson with all my heart, I'm sure you don't believe it, hell _nobody_ believes it. They all think it's my fault…and it is."

"Sam, a mugger attacked you and Freddie helped you," Spencer said quickly. "Isn't that how you explained it?"

"Yes, but it's still my fault Freddie's dead!" Sam shut her eyes tightly and felt like fainting. "Freddie came to me and told me he loved me, and I was too damn afraid of my feelings and I was afraid of being hurt or possibly hurting him in the future…I dejected him and dashed his hopes, I said something I shouldn't have. I told him that he lied, he really cared about Carly, I told him that he was a jerk for using her to get to me if that was the case. I saw the hurt and pain in his eyes as he turned and walked away from me. My heart ached there and I made the mistake of not going after him, I turned and ran into a mugger who chased me. In the end, Freddie protected me until he died. I know what you're thinking and I agree fully, it should have been me that died, not him!"

"Don't talk like that, Sam!" Spencer quickly hurried over to Sam and placed his hands on her shoulder.

"Oh shut up Spencer, you don't give a damn either, you're like all of them. You think it's my fault, you think I should have died and do you know something? I agree with them! I hate myself for everything that I ever did to Freddie, I loved him for years and was afraid of my own goddamn feelings. I don't know how long I loved him, it may have been the day I first met him that I started developing feelings for him." Sam was letting bitter tears run down her cheeks, she didn't know why she bothered going on air, nobody would care. "I was hurt by Jonah long ago when he cheated on me, long before then I was hurt by another person that I had feelings for. It was my first crush even. Do you know what he did? He stood me up for god sake! He stood me up for another person! Another person that I liked shortly after that actually went out with me, but was it because he liked me? No, he didn't like me at all, hell, he teased me for being desperate. He said he was only doing that because of a bet that he could actually get Carly to ask him out. I've been living in her shadow for years!"

"Is this the real issue?"

"Hell no, it's not! It's because of all this that I built up a goddamn wall to protect myself from anyone that got close to me, even if I had feelings for them! I knew Freddie would never hurt me, but I was still afraid, even when he came to me. I let my own fear get the better of me and I yelled at Freddie, I deserve to die, Spencer! Freddie didn't deserve what he got, if anyone did it sure as hell wasn't him. Do you think anybody cares, though? Do you think anybody even wants to try to make me feel better? No, every one of them, including Carly, just makes me feel worse." Spencer released Sam and stood up straight with his arms at his side, Sam turned to face the camera and wiped her tears.

"I would say that I'm sorry…"

"It won't do you any good, nobody can honestly tell me they are sorry when they all hate me. So don't waste your time, I just wanted to tell everyone that I'm sorry for what I did and that I loved Freddie Benson no matter what. I didn't mean to hurt anyone, I didn't want to hurt him, nothing ever turns out right for me anymore, anyway. I want to say goodbye because it's obvious Carly can handle this herself. I'm going to stay in my own home, hell I may just leave my home and find another place to stay since my goddamn grandparents seem to be siding with everyone else in this matter. They don't give a damn about me either…iCarly doesn't need me, nobody does." With that, Sam walked away and Spencer turned to the camera and frowned, he sighed as he walked over to the laptop, more viewers than he could remember seeing had decided to sign on and watch what Sam said.

"Maybe we were wrong to treat her like this," Spencer said quietly. "I should go after her, but she won't listen to me or anybody else for that matter."

**-NEW SCENE-**

Sam ran down the street and into a nearby park, it was the one place she actually cared to be at the moment, it was the place she first met Freddie so many years ago. She actually knew Freddie long before they ever knew Carly. Freddie had been a geek back then, a cute seven year old geek. Sam smiled softly and walked to a where an old bridge stood, nobody was ever permitted to go onto the bridge anymore because it had become rickety and unstable, it was also about twenty feet above the lake. She dared not to go onto the bridge because she didn't want to fall to the depths, the lake at the bottom wasn't as deep as it was in the rest of the park and there were rocks at the bottom that would hurt if she landed on them. There was also a current that would take her to another part of the park, she did love to visit the bridge though, she always did, she titled the bridge as the 'Seddie' bridge. It was a combination of her name with Freddie's and it was because she first met him on the bridge, they both found out they loved playing on it every day, they just never played at the same time, hence they didn't know each other when they met.

-_Flashback-_

A seven year old girl walked to the park with her mother, she looked up and smiled. "Mommy, can I go play on the bridge now?"

"Of course you may, Sam, you don't even have to ask," Mrs. Puckett said with a smile.

"Thanks!" Sam ran off and Mrs. Puckett sat next to another mom.

"Hello, I'm Amy Puckett." The mom looked over and smiled.

"I'm Della Benson, it's a pleasure to meet you."

Sam ran onto the bridge and found it to be occupied, she saw a boy her age running back and forth on the sturdy bridge. "You're going to fall," Sam said quickly. The boy stopped and looked at the girl, he smirked and crossed his arms.

"I don't think I will," The boy stated. "I play on this bridge every day and I never fall."

"I come here every day and my mommy says to watch out, it's twenty feet above the water…" Sam walked over to the boy and pushed him, he shouted as he started to stumble backwards so she quickly grabbed him and sighed. "See what I mean, you have to be careful!"

"You pushed me!"

"What's your name? I'm Sam Puckett."

"I'm in your class at school, Mrs. Cruze, our teacher. You never see me!"

"Oh, I'm sorry. You're Freddie Benson, right?"

"Yes…you know my name?"

"I'm not completely ignorant, I should know the name of every boy in the class."

"Oh…"

"Well, you probably know all the girls."

"No, they don't talk to me. You're actually the first to talk to me." Freddie looked down as Sam frowned, both sat on the edge of the bridge and grabbed the ropes.

"I'm sorry, I know! I'll be your friend!"

"You will?"

"Yes, and if you play here every day and I play here everyday, we can see each other in the park!" Freddie's face turned slight red as he looked away.

"You're a girl though, it's strange."

"I don't see how it'd be strange. I mean, I have a few friends but not many that I hang out with. Those that I do know don't know a lot about me." Freddie looked over at Sam as she looked down.

"Tell me something about you."

"I love dogs! I can't have any though because my daddy is allergic to dogs and he's sick now so mommy can't afford to get one."

"That's too bad, dogs are sweet. My mommy is too nervous to let me have a dog, she says the dog would give me fleas and ticks." Sam laughed slightly and Freddie looked away with a blush. "You're laughing at me…"

"I'm sorry, I just thought it was funny that your mommy is that concerned, my mommy's concerned like that almost. She's sad though because daddy's sick."

"I know! We should make a card for your dad!" Sam nodded and smiled as she stood up with Freddie.

"You know what, you're not bad." Freddie smiled and hugged Sam, she blushed as Freddie let go.

"So does that mean we're best friends now?"

"Yeah, we're best friends! We should name the bridge also!"

"What would we name it?"

"Well, I want to name it because we met here and since we're best friends now, it should be something about us. How about 'Seddie' because it's a combination of our name."

"Aw, but it starts with your name."

"It sounds better than 'Fam' and it has most of your letters." Freddie smiled and nodded.

"Okay, then I like it!"

-_End Flashback-_

Sam let a tear escape her as the rain pelted down on her, she knew she'd catch a cold but she didn't care. She smiled softly as she imagined two silhouettes of a boy and a girl holding on to the old, torn ropes of the bridge. She wished so much that she could step onto the bridge, but it was a bad idea, it was old and not stable, and the rain made it worse than usual. Sam set her backpack down and took out her little stuffed dog and smiled softly. Freddie had given it to her, she wished so much that she could have told him how much she appreciated it, the dog meant more to her than anything at the moment.

"Ugh, what are you doing here?" A voice asked. Sam turned to see Valerie standing behind her.

"Why are you here?" Sam asked as she eyed Valerie and the group of girls standing behind her. "It's raining, wouldn't you catch a cold?"

"What about you?"

"I don't really care, I was just thinking of some old memories." Valerie laughed and shook her head.

"You're a hopeless bitch, do you realize that? You're a hopeless, insane, bitchy whore."

"Was this why you came here? How did you even know I was here?"

"Oh I don't know…maybe it was because I saw you running here like the little baby you are." Sam scoffed as Valerie scowled. "You know, Freddie was wrong to ever like you, he didn't know what he was getting into. Back when we dated, he told me he liked you. Why you couldn't possibly see that, I don't know, but I know he didn't deserve to fall for a girl like you, you only dashed his hopes and shattered his heart."

"Yeah…I know, and I've paid for it." Valerie chuckled and pointed toward the stuffed animal in her hands.

"What is that?" Sam scowled and held the dog close.

"Freddie gave this to me."

"Hah! You don't deserve it!" Sam stepped back as Valerie stepped toward her.

"No, go away."

"How dare you. You break Freddie's heart and insist on keeping that dumb stuffed dog he gave you? You don't deserve it, you never even deserved his heart. In fact, I couldn't get him so I don't see why you should keep something from him."

"It's special to me because it was something he gave to me. I loved him, I always did, I've liked him since I first met him."

"That's why you picked on him every day of his life and tormented him constantly." Sam growled slightly and braced herself to attack Valerie, she wasn't really sure she could do anything at the mental stability. She missed Freddie, she wanted nothing more than to be with him, she loved him too much and didn't want to be without him. "Give me the animal."

"No!"

"Give me the animal, you bitch."

"You're the bitch, Valerie, I don't intend to give this to you!"

"I said give it to me!" Valerie rushed toward Sam and grabbed at her, Sam leapt back and growled. She was going to kick Valerie or punch her, whatever she did she wasn't going to let Valerie have the one thing that kept her close to Freddie.

"Leave me alone, this isn't yours! It's the only link that I have with Freddie and I won't let you do anything to it, I will hit you if I have to."

"I'd like to see you try." Sam looked around and saw several girls surround her. One of the girls pushed Sam, causing her to growl and start to attack, that's when she felt the dog get pulled from her hand. She gasped and turned to see one of the girls holding the stuffed dog.

"Give that back to me you bitch!" Sam ran toward the girl only to have the girl toss the animal over to another.

"This is like that monkey game," Valerie said with a smirk.

"No!" Sam jumped and tried to catch the stuffed dog as it was thrown once more. "Give that back, it's the only thing I have left of Freddie!" Valerie quickly pushed Sam to the side and grabbed the animal out of the air.

"Well if this means so much to you…" Sam glared at Valerie and looked down at the stuffed dog. She slowly stepped forward and yearned to hold the animal.

"Give it back to me, Valerie, please. I've been through so much, I won't ever pick on another I won't ever do anything wrong again if you just let me have that dog. Please, it means so much to me." Sam let the tears fall as the thunder crashed louder than before. "Please, I don't have anything else to remember Freddie by and Carly hates me now." Valerie scoffed and lifted the dog in the air.

"You don't deserve Freddie's memory and you sure as hell don't deserve Carly's friendship. I suppose if you really want this dog though, you'll just have to get it. Sure, I'll kindly give it to you." The other girls were starting to look at Valerie nervously now, they were getting tired of the prank that Valerie was doing.

"Come on Valerie, just give her the dog," One girl said. Valerie looked at Sam and her face softened.

"Okay…I will…I'm sorry, I'm no better than she is." Valerie held the dog toward Sam but one girl ran and snatched it from Valerie's hand.

"Why are you seriously giving this bitch back this damn thing!" The girl exclaimed.

"Hey, give that back!" Valerie exclaimed. Everyone stared with wide eyes as the girl tossed the dog on the "Seddie" bridge. "No!" Valerie looked over at Sam and expected her to just break down and cry, but Sam wasn't about to do that. Sam lost all reasoning and quickly pushed several girls aside.

"Oh my god, she's not going to…" The girl that threw the dog on the bridge was wide eyed with fear as Sam ran onto the bridge and picked up the dog. Valerie ran toward the edge of the bridge and called out to Sam.

"Come on, slowly!" Valerie exclaimed. Sam looked to Valerie and frowned, a part of her didn't want to leave the bridge, it held too much meaning to her. Yet another part of her didn't wish to die, however it felt like the part of her that wanted to be with Freddie forever was winning. Sam slowly took a step forward when the thunder crashed and the lightning flashed, Sam fell down with a crash on the bridge. The next thing heard was the screaming of all the girls as Sam felt herself falling through the air with several boards and ropes. She closed her eyes expecting there to be a very sharp pain before death.

"Are you okay, Sam?" A voice asked. Sam opened her eyes slowly and found herself looking Freddie in the eyes.

"Freddie, you…" Sam looked around and saw herself floating in the air, she knew Freddie was holding her though.

"I pulled you out before you landed." Sam's eyes were wide as Freddie pointed to the water. Sam looked down and frowned, she couldn't find her body anywhere but she could see the sad looking eyes of the dog floating down the water. The girls had left the area and were running around the lake looking for her.

"Am I alive or dead now?" Freddie frowned as he closed his eyes, Sam felt like crying but couldn't because she was in Freddie's arms. "If I'm with you then I must be dead. Why did you pull me out before I landed?"

"I did not want you to feel any pain, you did not deserve it. Sam, you were never at fault for my death, I would have protected you no matter what. You never deserved any pain, and as for everyone else, they never fully understood you and they only looked for someone to blame in their sadness and confusion. Our deaths were early, but there was nothing that could have been done at the time, do not be mad with Carly or anyone else, they did not know how to respond to what happened." Sam smiled softly because she could feel that Freddie had been watching over her, she wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled as a sparkle fell from her eyes. The rain ceased to fall at that and Freddie looked upwards. "It's time to go Sam, we'll leave the rest to our friends."

"What does that mean?" Sam felt herself moving and noticed that Freddie was starting to float upwards with her. "Freddie I didn't get to say this to you before, but I want to say it, it has to be said. I love you."

"I love you too." Sam's lip quivered as Freddie lowered his head to her and kissed her lips. She loved the feeling and knew that she could be happy now, she would be with Freddie forever.

* * *

That's the end, I hope you enjoyed it. I'm considering writing a oneshot that's a sequel of this. It's where Carly tries to bring them back somehow. Let me know what you thought of this _and_ let me know if you think I should write a sequel to this. I expect reviews on that part.

The sequel to this is up now, it's titled: "Bringing Them Back"


End file.
